


The Dread Pirate Sandburg

by 852_Prospect_Archivist



Category: The Sentinel
Genre: Challenge: Other, Humor, None - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-05-10
Updated: 2013-05-10
Packaged: 2017-12-11 03:35:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 728
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/793549
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/852_Prospect_Archivist/pseuds/852_Prospect_Archivist
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jim, Blair, and True Love.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Dread Pirate Sandburg

**Author's Note:**

> For the "Princess Guide" challenge. Just a little bit of 

## The Dread Pirate Sandburg

by Selkie

fluff resulting from trying to write around writers block. Apologies if its already been done. 

Comments to selkie@apexmail.com 

* * *

The Dread Pirate Sandburg 

"I am Megan Montoya, and you killed my father. Prepare to die!" With that cry, Megan swung her sword at the approaching soldier. As always, her aim was accurate, and the man's torso was neatly sliced in half. 

"Why do you keep saying that? You killed the man who killed your father." Simon said as he manuvered his horse around a stone well. 

"Habit, I guess." She shrugged as her horse trampled another charging soldier. "Kind of like how some people always grunt when they throw a javelin. Anyways, that's the last of the soldiers. Ready to gallop, Jimbo?" 

"He's strapped down on the horse now now." Jim said as he patted the limp, damp form of Blair Sandburg on the shoulder. 

"Then let's ride before they send out reinforcements." Simon said. "And hope we don't reach Miracle Max's too late." 

So three men and one woman set off on their horses galloping for half a day through field and forest. When they finally reached Miracle Max's home on the outskirts of a nearby village, they were surprised to find him already outside waiting for him. 

"Yeah, yeah you'd think I was running a buy one resurection, get one free special or something." Max said as he eyed Blair's limp body. "And yes, he's only mostly dead again, so let's get him inside. So what happened to him this time?" Jim and Simon untied Blair from his horse and carried him inside. 

"We had just stopped Jim's marriage to Humperdink, I killed the man who killed my father, and we were figthing out way out of the castle." Megan said as she followed them inside. "We had gotten as far as the drawbridge when a soldier took a swing at Jim's back. Blair stepped in front of the man, and stopped the blow from striking and in the process we think he hit his head on something before he fell in the moat." 

"It was a little confusing, so we aren't sure exactly how it happened." Simon said. "Then we managed to grab a few horses, kill a couple more evil soldiers, and make our way back to you." 

"Got it." Max said "Careful there. If you let him drip on the Italian tile in the foyer, my wife's gonna kill me, and then you're back to square one." 

"Set him over by the fire again?" Simon asked. 

"Same as last time." Max said. 

"Last time?" Jim said. 

"It was while we were trying to break you out. I'll tell you the whole story later Megan said. They carefully placed Blair's body next to the fire. Max disappeared behind a door to retrieve his bellows. 

"Okay, now you need to open his mouth." Jim reached over and mushed the unconscious man's mouth open. 

With expert ease, Max slid the bellows into Blair's mouth and started pumping. 

"This should only take a minute or three..." He said as he started pumping harder and harder. In a few minutes, he was breathing heavily, but there seemed to be no improvement in Blair's condition. 

"I'm sorry, but I seem to be having a problem getting enough suction." He wheezed. 

"Enough suction, I'll give you suction." And suddenly Jim sprang to Blair's side and placed his lips on Blair's lips. With a gasp, he inhaled, and created such a vaccuum between his lips and Blair's that he could have sucked up a bowling ball. 

After a minute, Jim peeled his lips away from Blair's lips, and the water surged out of Blair's lungs like a gurgling fountain. Blair gasped, coughed a few times, and then sat up. 

"Want to try that again, Buttercup?" Blair said. 

"Buttercup, why do I have to be Buttercup?" 

"You think I like being called the Dread Pirate Roberts any better? Sometimes you're just stuck with a name." 

"Just kiss him already." Max muttered. "We already know they've found true love." 

And forgetting about names, the two kissed. It was a kiss that showed such love that the world had never seen before and likely would never see again. 

And then Blair slipped his Buttercup the tongue, but that is another tale entirely. 

* * *

End The Dread Pirate Sandburg. 


End file.
